Healing Journey Part 9: Weeks, Months & Years

Days turned into weeks, which turned into months that then became years.  In August of 2008 Grant informed me that during the depths of sleep one night I cried, “Jesus heal me, heal me quickly.”   More months passed.  We moved to Colorado in  May of 2009 and I continued the most active seizure year I’ve ever experienced. God met me in the physical valley and carried me through the aftermath of pain.  For the first time I cried out to God in true desperation.  Knowing what he had promised I left my life in his hands.  He was free to do as he would.

Waiting for some time now, watching, wondering how God would enact this beautiful promise I’d neglected the possibility that he’d speak to me regarding its specifics.  I was moving forward under the impression that one day, in his timing, God would heal my body and the promise would be fulfilled. Mundane chores were taking up my day … cleaning, washing, eating, the list goes on … Holy Spirit interruption.  I wasn’t reading or praying … nothing “spiritual” being done.  God chose that moment and spoke to me as friends do. The message was clear, “You will be healed through childbirth.”

It came and went so fast my momentary lapse of doubt was eaten up by the knowledge that left to myself,  this would never have entered my mind.  But, I wasn’t pregnant … yet.  Telling my husband got this response … “well, we’re not gonna get pregnant, just to test it out.”  I have to admit I was a bit deflated.  In a way I agreed, but I really wanted to test this promise.  I knew, however, that God would confirm his plan, enact his purposes and lead us along straight paths.  I would just have to wait.

Confirmation came quickly.  As I was talking with my brother one day he said, “Lois, I have this feeling God is going to heal you through childbirth.”  My mouth just about dropped open.  I hadn’t shared this with anyone yet except Grant.  Yet in this moment was still a question … will it be my first pregnancy? Second? Third? How many children will I have before the promise is fulfilled?  I could only pray it would be the first.

Following this message was seizure after seizure.  I was hospitalized, placed in a coma, weak and unable to remember simple things I’d known for a lifetime.  My condition seemed to be getting worse and the reality that cried out in my mind ran contrary to the message of healing and life.   Finally able to return home, but with a lack of memory and a weakened voice I cried on my knees to the Lord, “heal me! If you want to take my life, take it, but if you’re going to leave me here, heal me, for your glory!”

I still have my earthly life.  God restored my voice and my memory … he is the almighty healer!

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